Written by Soumya, Southeast Asia Overseas Educator
I’m sitting in the sweltering heat at a cafe along one of Chiang Mai’s quiet streets, noticeably still after all of the Songkran festivities and more recently, the departure of our very own Pon Lue crew. By the time you read this, you will likely be in your own beds in Portland, eyes gazing blankly at the ceiling, wondering if this was all a dream. As we close out this leg of the journey together, let me take us back to the beginning…
Our paths crossed for the first time on a sunny September day in Portland when we have introduced to each other and the infamous Carpe basement for the first time. At orientation, we wondered who our cohort mates were and if we were going to like them – and also what in the world did we get ourselves into?
On a chilly February day, the second mysterious OE, yours truly, finally made an appearance in the basement and the group was complete when we were all united at the PDX airport in our matching shirts, ready to take off. We said goodbye to our families, took in our last breaths in the cold, and prepared ourselves for many hours of travel, language barriers, and steamy temperatures.
We stumbled off that long plane ride in Singapore and realized that no, this wasn’t a prank! We really made it to Southeast Asia. At Changi Airport, we explored the butterfly gardens and were told very gently by two different airport workers that we looked very tired and didn’t we want to try the nice lounge chairs upstairs?
After many hours of transit, we finally landed in Siem Reap! We kicked it off with orientation in the park where did charades of what we thought we’d be doing over the semester, played Marco Polo in the pool, and supported Levi through a serious case of “Ankle Waaaaaat?” and he wrote great food reviews. Covid made a guest appearance; we fell in love with Cho, Rattana and Chum; drank copious amounts of coconut water; marveled at the history and stature of Angkor Wat; savored our breakfast smoothies and loc lac at Helen’s; relaxed for the first time swimming at the thousand-year old reservoir; and got used to being blasted by the sweet dusty Cambodian air as we rattled along in Khmer tuktuks with the beloved Mr. Cobra. We were also honored to visit Cho’s village and meet Cho’s mom, receive a water blessing from a monk, we impressed Cho and Rattana with a freestyle rap at lunch, were struck by the bomb and landmine art at the landmine museum with Bill, met our new overlord Pon Louey, and said a sad goodbye to our friend Nee and Gary the cat.
At PTD, we got really good at “put your hand on your friend shoulder!”, responding to “HELLO TEACHER!”, and had our first dance parties under the streetlights and around the dinner table. We snoozed in the hammocks, ran to be first to shower, had a blast at the Phare circus, contributed a mistaken but very unique mural featuring a gummy worm in space on the wrong shed, and got really into “g-g-g gorilla”. Levi dug into teaching from his own experiences and did a workshop on autism for parents of children with special needs in the community. We spent time learning and laughing with Rith, Visal, Hou, Sopour, Leda, and Sukhub, got frustrated by and ultimately succeeded at the keypad game (shout out to Kailee’s laser focus), took a joyride on the bamboo train & nearly fell off tandem bikes, learned how much Hayhay loves fruit, and marveled at millions of bats exiting the caves at dusk. J defeated covid (woohoo!) and played a lot of bass, Jolly made a music video, we grit our teeth through all of the weddings & prayer music and dogs barking at 4 am, toured the farm and snacked on sour mangos, learned about health care and education in Cambodia with Rith, and dove into the sobering history of the Khmer Rouge at the Well of Shadows.
On the way to the Floating Villages, we met Yusef, who’s a bloody cool guy, spent a full day in the boats waving at kids and witnessing Levi’s epic bionic knee burn, conquered our fear of the water, gaped at the crocodiles, and had many conversations at Osmos over lunch that were punctuated by the sound of motorboats (and our triangle hands while we waited), watching people brush their teeth in water we didn’t dare touch for fear of losing life and limb. We came off of a week of teaching kids and taught more kids, perfected our bump-spike-set with the schoolkids & built a second volleyball court, planted chilis and unearthed layers of trash and learned how much more there is to do to address plastic waste and how to take care of the environment. We were rocked to sleep every night in our boat houses, had the first inaugural boy talk circle (Botox circle), had more or less success learning to weave mats from fragrant water hyacinths, got addicted to morning coffee by our homestay moms, developed a crush on the boat driver, and learned about the Cham people with Yusef.
From there, we visited Tonle Sap, the beating heart of the Mekong River, on the way to Phnom Penh. We spent a somber morning at S21 & Killing Fields – witnessing the portraits of the faces, meeting one of the survivors who saved his brothers. Later we did a scavenger hunt where we got to break free a little bit and flap those wings – some of us did a lap around Olympic Stadium, wooed the sellers at the Russian Market, visited secondhand stores and Khraft, practiced bargaining, and tried Indonesian food. We gave Dulce’s hair the first chop, kind of fulfilled our club dancing dreams at Epic with that laser light show and the apple pen chorus. Kailee had the time of her life and went out with a bang because the very next day she brought the break to breakdancing. We loved on the Tiny Toones kids’ performances and Carol’s freestyle (she claims she blacked out) and were inspired by meeting Short & hearing the story of being formerly incarcerated in the US and sent back to a place they’d never known.
On the way to Vitamin Air, Carol took one for the team standing in the back of the van, we developed a little crush on 1) Sela and also 2)Sela’s curls, were inspired by Thavry’s life story and cute dresses covering her tiny prego belly, were surprised by that tall white guy who was her husband, squealed at our feet getting eaten by tiny fishies swimming at the water hole and gobbled up pomelo on the way home, fought off/gave in to ants in our tents, and stayed up all night stargazing. We savored Salouy’s amazing food, had our heads combed over for lice checks, got bumped along on a tractor ride where Adrian fell off, and frolicked in the amazing swimming hole with more pomelo and watermelon. We learned about how to save a life from Levi’s Narcan passion class, owed Sela lots of TWO DOLLAS, Adrian played a lot of guitar, Soumya stumped everyone at Contact for the first time, we gave Carol the perfect amount of dinnermates as Jesus, hummed along to Sela strumming the guitar, stoked the fire at barbecue night, and laughed at Gypsy getting her shoe getting stuck in the mud. We skipped rocks, were woken up by the melodious ass-shaking beats of City Girls (Kat and J – best student leaders ever), and learned about the importance of protecting the forest.
In Kampot, we slapped our faces with mud and swam in the ocean, celebrated Hayden’s birthday with an Avatar cake, put our skills to the test SUPing on the Kampot River, caught shrimp in bottles and had a mud war. We did Kat’s Roots & shoots on the dock, gave up on the food that left us gassy/bloated/exploding/with diarrhea, or worse. In lieu of watching Netflix, we crafted a story about the monkey storm where Hades made an appearance (thanks Kat). We supported Kailee on crutches amidst all of those planks, celebrated Adrian practicing swimming, jumped off the dock a time or two and used all of our muscles to get out, braved a night with the rat in the room, lost Vale and Gypsy in the mangroves while they went above and beyond collecting seedlings, were inspired by the documentary Current Sea and efforts to protect marine life, and appreciated our host Sal. Ultimately, we said goodbye to Kailee and got ready for Thailand.
Transitioning to Bangkok, we were reunited with Carol at the airport where we may or may not have looked like a group of missionaries. We arrived and had that memorable taxi ride when Hayden started to sing and the driver said “I’m going to turn on the radio”, Lucky J got that sweet jacket at the mall and may have gotten turned down a time or two, we learned fire K-pop choreo from Kat under the trees in Lumphini Park, got our money’s worth of free juice boxes from a very bougie hospital with Levi and Jolly, and watched Carol & Josh reunite at jazz night. We toured the Grand Palace with Josh and were inspired by his story, went on a date or two and explored some amazing markets, got tattoos, soaked up the art at the Bangkok Arts & Cultural Center, and accidentally shipped Pon Louey off to India. At the night market, we shook our heads as Kat bought 12 pairs of socks and freaked out over the baby bunnies, Gypsy basically bought her brothers a brand new wardrobe, we took in the smooth vibes of a blues bar (and went back the next night), rubbed shoulders at the gay club and jaw-droppingly good K-pop dancing, and finally took the train with those luxury sleeper beds, where we broke bread & chocolate & candies.
We always thought Carpe was a cult, but at Gaia Ashram, with three claps we finally became one – and we loved it. We slowed down and expressed our gratitude before each meal, befriended the kitties and chickens, learned how to make a lasagna bed, chopped down banana trees, sweat buckets, marveled at that seed storm and for some of us, our first lightning & thunderstorm. We stumbled downstairs for morning yoga with Pedro, giggled (and impressed ourselves) through partner planking at yoga with Tuk, and ate seconds of every meal of amazing food. We learned about ourselves, each other, and our ecosystem with Om; outsmarted the walking duck; interviewed the local shaman and weaver; chased the dogs incessantly out of the Sala (we see you Windy, Cloudy, Gollum, Ricky and Lucky). Vale taught us how to make delicious arroz de coco, we spent a day making cob-oven pizza together, put our flavoring skills to the test crafting kombucha, got endless Thai teas and delicious brownies made by Toby, let ourselves go in Five Rhythms and Ecstatic Dance, brought the fun to Gaia with our spontaneous dance party when we delayed dinner by 30 minutes, and shared stories, laughter and experiences with our new friends Maren, Toby, Tom, Om, Tuk, Pedro, P’Eeuw, and Luna. We contributed to the village school, slinging mud (and rolling around in it); explored the Nong Khai night market and threw our own dance party in the songthaew back; learned about social enterprises and making our superstar teams and presenting our dreams to each other; and put our hands to the test learning the art of the Thai massage on each other and mistakenly gnawing at a kaffir lime (hint: do not recommend). At open mic night at the campfire we were treated to spoken word, poetry, music, Levi’s song game, and storytime.
After a sad goodbye to Gaia, we arrived into the apocalyptic smog of Chiang Rai and met Flynn, rode bikes to the market and enjoyed a night of AC and nice beds before Thellie and Pi’Akong whisked us to Baan Poo Koh. We made friends with Pink who finally gave us a rice crepe, learned watercolors with Gypsy and the cumbia and caballo dorado with Dulce; celebrated Dulce’s 20th birthday with cake, handmade signs, and lots of love; visited P’Akong’s farm; and flirted with the locals (especially one in particular who called us beautiful). We mixed buckets and buckets of cement, carried rocks on rocks, kept the energy up with our incessant dancing, and savored our ice creams (thank you well-timed ice cream man). We were inspired by P’Akong’s philosophy towards life, learned about issues facing hill tribe communities, celebrated a final night with Carpe-sanctioned traditional rice whiskey and dancing, and made our way to the Lahu homestay where we learned how to weave baskets and bracelets and attempted to keep up with the dancing youth.
Our journey brought us at long last to Chiang Mai for Student-Directed Travel, where we were drenched with water as soon as we stepped foot into the city for Songkran. After taking it one too many times, J came through with water guns for us and we joined the throngs of people celebrating out on the streets, throwing ourselves into the thick of the water wars. We spent a fun day at the water park, teaming up to throw J into the water at the first chance, slipping down the slide endlessly, and braving getting thrown into the air from the pillow bounce. We put our skills to the test making khao soi, pad thai, and mango sticky rice at our cooking class, stuffing ourselves until we were comatose, explored the night markets, got our nails did and noses pierced and met new friends at pools. We learned the art of spoken word poetry with Jolly, closed the semester in a ceremony with the background noise of middle-aged Thai women doing group exercise at the park, and rescued Hayden from anaphylactic distress with a final trip to the hospital (would it be a Pon Lue semester without coming medically full circle?). We closed out the night at the North Gate Jazz Co-op to the sweet sounds of the saxophone and “Purple Rain”.
It feels like just yesterday that I slipped into the basement and met you all, and here we are, already on the other side. As much as I wish we had more time together, I’m endlessly grateful for all of the laughter, dance parties, memories, music, caring, adventures, meals and magic we shared. No semester is the same, but this one stands out to me. It feels special to have led with someone like Carol, who I have endless love and respect for, and to lead and learn from a group of such unique, thoughtful, caring, and creative individuals such as yourselves. Over the course of these eight weeks, our little crew has turned into a loving, albeit at-times dysfunctional family. We may never know how to get anywhere on time, but we sure know how to shake ass and have fun getting there.
When I go home, sometimes I wonder, what is real? Is “real” only at home? Did I leave the real me in Cambodia or Thailand? How do I bridge the me that was with the me that is? I know each of us will walking our own paths as we figure this out, but I also know that whatever happened to us is real, what we did was real, and who we are becoming, now or in the future, is real. I hope each of us will incorporate all that we witnessed and experienced, both in the world and in ourselves, as we step into crafting the stories of our lives as we return home.
As I close, I want to leave you with this poem by David Whyte:
“Above the mountains
the geese turn into
the light again
Painting their
black silhouettes
on an open sky.
Sometimes everything
has to be
inscribed across
the heavens
so you can find
the one line
already written
inside you.
Sometimes it takes
a great sky
to find that
small, bright
and indescribable
wedge of freedom
in your own heart.
Sometimes with
the bones of the black
sticks left when the fire
has gone out
someone has written
something new
in the ashes of your life.
You are not leaving
you are arriving.”
-The Journey
Wherever you are arriving, I hope you carry that wedge of freedom in your heart that you felt here. And know that as you discover and embrace the one line already written inside you, you give others the permission to Pon Lue too.
With love,
Soumya
